The event’s goal was to help attendants “leave with a better understanding of why yoga is so effective for so many people, and also how they can use specific yoga practices to achieve the effects that they are looking for,” conference founder Eddie Stern said. One consistent, resonant theme woven throughout was that through cultivating individual well-being, yoga practices also have the ability to promote social interconnectedness and thereby societal healing. Here is a brief recap of the conference’s top takeaways.

Social Connectedness Promotes Health

According to Stephen Porges, PhD, when we experience positive social connectedness, it triggers a sympathetic nervous response called the “polyvagal state”. This state of increased vagal tone not only coincides with tremendous health benefits, it triggers “co-regulation” in which positive feedback occurs between two or more individuals. In other words, the experience of connectedness promotes health and well-being. On the other hand, a chronic disruption of connectedness is the definition of trauma, according to Porges. Listening and witnessing—some of skills developed through yoga and meditation—are therapy, he says. But in terms of yoga as therapy, someone’s increased polyvagal tone only occurs when they are attentive and listening to another’s pro-social cues.

Yoga Can Heal the Wounds of Racial Distress

Based upon her clinical work, Gail Parker, PhD, observed that “race-based traumatic stress injury” occurs when people are continually marginalized. Over time, the experience of ongoing, recurrent exclusion and subtle hostility results in maladaptive responses, including intrusive thoughts, irritability, and overall stress. All of these have been directly correlated with so-called “life-style illnesses” such as diabetes, obesity, and heart disease. Parker called on individual yoga practitioners to acknowledge their own unwitting participation in exclusive communities marked by racial and economic homogeneity and to strive to create inclusive environments within yoga. Resonating with Porges’s talk, she emphasized the need for face-to-face eye contact as a vital component of social connectedness.

Related: A Conscious Reflection on Racial Tensions in America

Yoga Teaches Survival of the Wisest

Drawing on the classical Indian system of non-dualism philosophy (Advaita Vedanta), Deepak Chopra, MD, led the audience on a thought experiment proposing that what is ultimately real is in fact pure consciousness or “a field of infinite possibilities”. “Biology is an experience of awareness, not container of awareness,” he said, and the notion “I have a body” is merely a perceptual activity of an experience that shifts every moment. The higher brain functions and emotional potentials of metacognition and empathy that are cultivated in yoga practices are themselves evidence of how our everyday awareness represents only “limited bandwidth” of an infinite spectrum, he said. What the science is demonstrating, he explained, is that the cultivation of self-awareness through yoga and everything entailed by that (heightened empathy, compassion, health, resilience, etc.) proposes an alternative to the materialist model of “survival of the fittest”. Instead, Chopra advised, the science of yoga teaches us “survival of the wisest”.

Science on Yoga Serves a Larger Purpose

During a Q&A, moderator Erich Anderer, MD, chief of neurosurgery at NYU Langone Hospital, asked the panelists about the purpose of hard scientific data on yoga, given that “we already know yoga is good for you.” Sat Bir S. Khalsa, PhD eloquently summarized the collective views, explaining that mainstreaming yoga to societal systems like schools and hospitals will only happen with the backing of hard science. Furthermore, given yoga’s limited reach beyond a relatively small, privileged part of society, facilitating the greater mainstreaming of yoga is, in fact, addressing widespread social injustice.

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“Don’t surrender your loneliness so quickly. Let it cut more deep. Let it ferment and season you…” – Hafiz

What does it mean to not “surrender loneliness so quickly”? For most of my life, I would have preferred to surrender my loneliness yesterday. Loneliness felt like a painful, aching, hollow feeling at the core of my gut. It was my constant companion and I most certainly did not want it there. At some point in my twenties, I decided if I was going to spend so much of life being lonely, it was worth investigating what loneliness actually was. What I discovered didn’t stop me from ever getting lonely, but it helped transform my relationship to loneliness from something miserable to a powerful source of information.

Loneliness Hack #1: Make Friends with Desire

My first revelation was that at the center of loneliness was desire. It was a powerful longing for love. And yet, I had learned that that kind of longing was unattractive. I was told that I should stop looking for love, and that it would “happen when I least expected it”. I told myself that I better stop wanting things because not getting them made me feel desperate, pathetic, and disappointed. I told myself that I was too old, too ugly, and just too late for love, and then I told myself that love wasn’t real anyway (given the divorce rate). I tried anything and everything to get me to stop wanting love. Nothing worked. I continued to feel lonely.

One day, I was at the beach with my crush and my crush’s new girlfriend. As they snuggled together on the shore, I morosely wandered into the waves, feeling lost in a haze of loneliness and frustrated desire. Suddenly, I decided that instead of fighting off my yearning, I was going to try and open up to it. With each wave that crashed over my head I called out a new desire. “I want the dress I saw on 5th Avenue,” I started. Crash. “I want to be pretty.” Crash. “I want real love.” Crash. Instead of feeling depressed or lonely, opening up to each desire felt liberating. It felt strong and brave and exciting. Nothing guaranteed I would get these things, but just saying them felt almost as good. Within loneliness is a deep and powerful desire to connect. Trying to get rid of it won’t help. Opening up to the longing will.

Loneliness Hack #2: Learn the Difference Between Your Stories and the Truth

Everybody’s stories are different. Mine sounded like this: “I am so lonely. There must be something wrong with me. I’m too picky. I choose the wrong people. I must be immune to real love.” Sometimes another voice would swoop in: “You will find love! You just have to join a different dating app, cut your hair, and buy some new clothes. You can do this!” And on and on. These voices were part of the overall chorus of mental chatter that accompanied me throughout my day. Much of this “self-talk” was developed as a child to try and navigate my world, and much of it has stayed at the child level in terms of its maturity and problem-solving skills.

So what do we do when we realize we are lost in a maze of depressing self-chatter? First, congratulations! Noticing you are lost in thought (and not just living inside of it) is 80 percent of the battle. Next, notice if there is a feeling underneath the chatter that you don’t want to feel. Desire? Grief? Sadness? See if you can rest and breathe in the feeling itself, not in the mind’s attempt to cover it up. Finally, rather than fighting stories with other stories, try to just notice what is real. The chair underneath you. The wind on your face. Your body as it breathes. These things are real. Wake up out of your circular thoughts by sensitizing yourself to the here and now.

Related: The Fascinating Science of Why You’re So Hard on Yourself

Loneliness Hack #3: Come Home to Yourself

Sometimes loneliness comes to visit us when we are surrounded by people, in a relationship, and/or scrolling through the social media posts of 1,000+ of our “friends”. In my experience, this type of loneliness is a result of being alienated from ourselves. We are not experiencing the richness of life. We have left the building.

There is a Zen quote that says, “A picture of a rice cake cannot satisfy hunger.” In other words, living life glued to our phones, saying things that others want to hear, or being lost in our thoughts leave us feeling hungry, empty, and alone. If you are experiencing this type of loneliness, stop whatever you are doing, and come back to yourself. Meditate with the practice below. Unplug. Exercise. Have an honest talk with a friend or a date with your journal. Your loneliness is a sign of your life calling out to you. Answer it. Come home.

We are deeply interconnected to one another. We breathe the same air, influence one another’s moods, and are made up of the same raw materials. Loneliness is a difficult mind state, but practicing these hacks whenever we feel lonely brings us back to ourselves, to our hearts, and to the interconnected present moment that holds it all. This is how we let loneliness “season” us, emerging more tender and open-hearted on the other side.

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Today, there are numerous tools at our disposal to help manage this time of the month. We have period-tracking applications, flexible menstrual cups to avoid messing with pads or tampons, and period-proof undies. There’s even a monthly service that delivers menstrual supplies, complete with organic treats and confections to lavish upon oneself during lady time. Whoopi Goldberg has launched a line of marijuana products aimed at those who suffer cramps. On top of these modern developments, there are also time-tested natural solutions for period pain and many of the other discomforts we weather every 21 to 28 days.

Here are some natural remedies to make your periods more manageable.

1. Eat right. A little dark chocolate doesn’t hurt, and can actually help with stress reduction. But sugary drinks and treats can alter our hormones and stress levels, impacting us negatively and increasing our risk for breast cancer, diabetes, and other illnesses later in life. Junk food can also impact mood, so it’s best to minimize in that area. According to Janet Zand, O.M.D., “Vegetables rich in magnesium and chlorophyll—dense greens—can help reduce inflammation and should be eaten often, but especially the week prior to your period. You could also take a magnesium supplement, for the same result.”
2. Herbs can help. Chamomile has been shown to alleviate cramping symptoms; a strong tea can be helpful in easing cramps and soothing the mood. Ginger has been shown to be just as beneficial, if not more so, because it has other healing properties, such as benefiting digestion, boosting the immune system, and easing nausea.  “Combine ginger and chamomile for a soothing, delicious tea that can help ease cramps and discomfort. Each woman will react differently, of course, so you must find what works for you,” says Zand.
3. Reduce Inflammation. According to recent research, there are biomarkers for the inflammation associated with painful periods, called CRP-specific proteins. Clinicians advise inflammation reduction during periods, to avoid excessive discomfort. Inflammation can be impacted by poor diet, especially excessive fat and sugars, so inflammation reduction can also be influenced by nutrition. According to the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine, there are nutritional adjustments one can make to combat discomfort during the cycle, including following a low-inflammation diet.
   

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   Related: Understanding the Relationship Between Diet and Inflammation

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4. Practice Yoga. Larissa Hall Carlson, a senior faculty member for the Kripalu Schools, recommends practicing yoga off the mat during flow days, or keeping on-the-mat sequences balanced and restorative. Carlson says, “Throughout my teens and 20s as a female athlete, I was pushed to exercise just as hard during my menstrual flow as I was the rest of the month. But in my 30s, as I deepened my yoga practice, studied Ayurveda, and relied upon Traditional Chinese Medicine for health advice and remedies, I discovered that by taking it easy the first few days of my period, not only did I have much steadier energy throughout the remainder of the month, but the PMS-related fatigue, brain fog, cramping, and aching I usually experienced diminished significantly.” Carlson suggests yoga nidra as a gentle mode of self-care: “Download a 30-minute guided yoga nidra practice and get cozy in Savasana (corpse pose; relaxation pose) with a cushion under the knees, a lavender eye pillow, and a warm blanket. The practice will be highly beneficial.”
5. Be good to yourself. It’s important to take the space we need to rest, restore, and rejuvenate. Whether you need a Netflix marathon, have to sleep in a bit later, or take a break from the gym for a couple of days, offering yourself a reprieve from the daily grind can be hugely beneficial. Many of us don’t see our periods as sacred because of social conditioning, along with some of the unpleasantness that accompanies them. But if we change our perception and habits around menses, even just a bit, we can see the gift of fertility with a grateful heart, and nurture our femininity. Slowing down can go a long way, and once your period ends, you’ll feel rested and rejuvenated—an empowering practice.

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